I’ve been reading the news—it’s been impossible to avoid—about Anthony Weiner’s errant penis showing up in unexpected places. Let me first make this point clear: I don’t care, even a little, who he’s having sexual encounters with, so long as everyone involved is an adult. I mean, of course I feel bad for his wife, and there’s a salaciousness to this type of news that’s difficult to ignore, but ultimately, there’s got to be way more important things to talk about. (What’s going on in Darfur these days? Anyone? Anyone? Anybody?) And I’ve read criticism of how Weinergate went down (no pun intended), and as I am unapologetically slanted far, far to the left, I am forced to agree when the left says Andrew Breitbart acted like a duplicitous cretin, though that’s somewhat akin to saying Donald Trump has silly hair. But an article I read recently claimed that the biggest problem with Weinergate is that it signals the end of sexual privacy.
*sigh* Really, left? That’s the WORST thing about it? Because I don’t see it as the end of sexual privacy. I mean, the media didn’t…oh, I don’t know…tape his private conversations without his knowledge or consent, and chum that to the media sharks. He sent a picture of his turgid member on Twitter, which is only slightly more private than blasting a cock signal into the night skies over Gotham City. Even Silvio Berlusconi knows enough to lay off the tweets. No, Anthony Weiner courted disaster; my guess is, he got an added thrill from being able to exploit technology in this way, but that’s just a supposition based on the fact that he repeatedly e-horndogged. And no, this isn’t the end of sexual privacy because—especially for politicians—that ended a long time ago. The Clinton/Lewinsky scandal removed any pretense that we would allow the sex life of the American politician to remain private, but for as long as we’ve equated political viability with moral high-ground-holding, sex lives have been fair game. I blame Watergate for the sea change in perception; the people wanted someone they could trust, not a liar and a thief. We’re still getting past that.
But no, the worst part about Weinergate (other than the unfortunate accompanying increase in airtime for bloated media whore Andrew Breitbart) was when he said, “At a time when the GOP is playing games with the debt limit, a member of the Supreme Court is refusing to recuse himself from matters he has a financial interest in, and middle class incomes are stagnant, many want to change the subject. I don’t.” Implying, of course, that he was the victim of an attempted deflection of interests for political purposes, and he just wanted to get his job done. Let
me translate: the real meaning behind what he said was, “Even though I have behaved reprehensibly, I’m going to tell you that an unnamed “Someone” on the right did this to me, and feed into the bias and divisiveness and distrust that have been breeding in our political system like rabbits in a no-predator zone. Because I am absolutely willing to use that divisiveness to meet my own ends, while trying to make it seem like I’m the beleaguered party, who’s struggling to get things done, to maintain integrity, in the face of personal and emotional trials. And one more thing…fuck you.” If, when caught (literally) with his pants down, he’d manned up and said, “Yes, I did it, I’ve behaved badly, I know I’ve let people down and the most important person to consider from this perspective is my wife, so now it’s time for us to figure out my next step and, hopefully, make amends,” then guess what? The scandal? Goes away. Or at least, it will do so far sooner than it would if he…you know…lied and tried to blame a vast right-wing conspiracy.
Anyway. I hope he and his wife resolve this in the way that suits them most adequately. I hope Anthony Weiner has enough of a sense of self to examine his mistakes and learn from them. I hope he takes the time to understand how deeply his attempted deception betrayed his constituents and undermined anysort of integrity he could retain from this mess. Mostly, though…I want to stop hearing about his knob.