Fake Spoiler Alert!

Hey, did you see this past week’s Downton Abbey?  Sad, innit, right?  I mean, can you even believe the writers killed…


You say on Facebook that you haven’t seen the thing that most of the planet is talking about, and yet you don’t want to hear any spoilers?

Go have fun and play at memegenerator.com

Go have fun and play at memegenerator.com

OK, so, here’s the thing.  I try not to spoil the dramatic plot twists from movies and television shows but sometimes I. Just. Want. To.  Particularly when I’m on the internet, which as we all know is a veritable cornucopia of fevered, hotheaded discussion and reactionism, and someone tries to squelch my lurid reactionary fervor.  Hey!  I’m processing an imaginary crisis over here!

I should, however, be thankful, because all the people begging me to not tell them about what happened on Downton Abbey (I’m not saying it’s sad, I’m just saying to watch with a box of tissues handy) inspired me to invent fake spoilers.  And not just for Downton Abbey; there’s a whole world of literature and movies and TV that begs to be fake-spoiled.

Here are but two.  More to come.

First up: The Downton Abbey fake spoiler that started it all.

Nobody saw this one coming.

Nobody saw this one coming.

I guarantee you, this one’s a total shocker.

And.  I’ve had Pride and Prejudice on the brain lately.  A friend has only recently read the book and seen the quintessential A&E/BBC/PBS version starring Colin Firth and Jennifer Ehle and as every new devotee does, has been talking about it and watching it…well, not quite obsessively, since she does shower and get to work on time and keeps her kids healthy and fed.  But.  Suffice to say I’ve seen plenty of Jane Austen clips surface on her Facebook wall.  Understandably; if I’d had Facebook the first time I saw P&P I, quite frankly, would have been worse.  No kids to feed, see?  For the uninitiated, set aside six hours for viewing as it is worth every corseted second of your time.  And…oh, what the hell.  Here’s some Wet Darcy for your entertainment.

Also for the uninitiated…FAKE SPOILER ALERT!

Can't tell under all them thar skirts, can ya?

Can’t tell under all them thar skirts, can ya?

I swear it’s all true.

Have a great day, folks.  Let this ping around in your brain for a while.  And rest assured, there are more coming.

10 responses to Fake Spoiler Alert!

  1. jp

    Almost snarfed my tea! LOLS to the eleventy! (I have been thinking of watching that whole Pride & Prejudice again, what is up with that?!


  2. So. I’m like talking to my Denver CO daughter Monday night and she asks if I watched Sunday’s DA.
    I say, “Hell, no! We were driving back from Destin. What happened?”
    D: I’m not going to tell you
    Me: Come on, I know you hate went I spoil endings for you, but I honestly don’t care. What happened?
    D: I’m not going to tell you. You can watch full episodes on PBS.org
    3.5 hours later I text: No! —– died!
    D text: It’s so terrible
    Me text: Might as well have another flu epidemic and kill em all off!
    D text: I know. She was the best one…And the way they did it! Because of the obstinance of a couple of pompous men! Wait, did you watch it or just goggle it?
    Me text: What?
    D text: Busted

    Ain’t the internets swell? Nikki


    • beyondpaisley – Author

      Poor Hagrid. 😉

      Though in all seriousness, it does seem like they’re turning Lord Grantham into some sort of patriarchal supervillain. Who can’t make a single correct decision.

      Hooray for the internets!


  3. Josie

    is it me? Is it me? oh never mind, I am too busy watching the first ten minutes of episode 5 over and over again.


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