Sometimes, I get spam that is too funny to relegate to the dustbins of history. This is one of those times. Here is a spam email I have recently received, turned haiku. Some words have been shortened to preserve the 17-syllable cadence but, for the most part, the text is entirely unchanged.

Enjoy.

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Image credits

Reverse phone lookup: https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.ReversePhoneLookupMobile

Cancel My Subscription: http://todaysmama.com/2011/08/words-for-people-you-hate/cancel-my-subscription-i-dont-need-your-issues/

World conference: http://news.richmond.edu/features/article/-/11006/global-intellectual-property-enforcement-conference-intellectual-property-institute-co-hosts-global-intellectual-property-enforcement-conference-and-sixth-annual-evil-twin-debate.html

It’s alive: http://www.sourballpython.com/blog/email-its-alive/

Grammar time: http://btr.michaelkwan.com/2010/11/18/grammar-101-why-word-order-matters/

Principal Skinner: http://redstaplerchronicles.com/the-top-20-principals-in-tv-and-movie-history/

Critical situation plan: http://emmanuelkuehn.blogspot.com/2010/10/in-critical-situations-stop-think-do.html

Bad reputation: http://nando-joanjett.blogspot.com/2009/06/joan-jett-bad-reputation_23.html

Kindness heart: http://www.scaryforkids.com/kindness/

Positive thinking: http://www.thewellnesswarrior.com.au/2012/02/are-you-positive-how-and-why-affirmations-work/

Poor planning: http://www.wearyourrecovery.com/store/product_info.php/products_id/1344

Seeing the future: http://somersaulteffect.com.au/market-myopia-blame-the-swot/

Business cat: http://www.quickmeme.com/meme/35r8j5

No hesitation Superman: http://jayc79.deviantart.com/art/Superman-flying-336232499

Success baby: http://tectivoo.com/6-most-popular-reverse-phone-lookup-sites/

Joan Jett Bad Reputation video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5RAQXg0IdfI