OK, so. George and I were channel surfing, and in a fit of kitsch-fueled crapgasm, we stopped on a Hallmark Channel movie (don’t judge). This particular one stars Andrew McCarthy, whose clout peaked in 1986 with his role as Blaine in Pretty in Pink.

I love this scene. I still love this movie, though really, people, you and I both know that Andie totally should have chosen Duckie. And I digress.

George looked at the TV screen and said, “Oh, man. That guy. I never could stand his sort of sad-sack, hangdog look.”

And you know, ten thousand years ago, waaaay back in 1986, I, like, totally thought Andrew McCarthy was, like, totally super-cute ‘n’ stuff. But you know, he does look sort of depressive. World-weary. A little glum.

For real, people. He totally looks like Droopy Dog.

Hello, all you happy people. You know what? I’m the hero.

He even kind of sounds like him.

So much for any nostalgia-fueled ’80s fest.