Separated at Birth: Sting

This isn’t so much a question of separated at birth (there is no discovery of a secret twinsie, at least not in today’s post) so much as it is a question of just what in the heck is going on here.

Sting, über-cool rock star, once a darling of the spiky and angular, aloof and yet angry set…

You could cut a roast with those cheekbones. Even his jacket is angular. Photo from sting.com

You could cut a roast with those cheekbones.
Even his jacket is angular.
Photo from sting.com

Has recently morphed into the love child of Mitch Miller (Sing Along with Mitch; ask your parents…or your grandparents…about it) and Clinton Kelly.

Hmmmm.

Hummina-whaaaaaaa?

I have nothing left to say. Imma leave this here.

Oh! And enjoy a little sing-along, on your way out.

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Dumb Celebrity Headlines: Giada Gets an Ouchie

For the last day, I’ve been trying to figure out if there’s any recent celebrity news I find less shocking and/or newsworthy than the fluff piece going around about Giada DeLaurentiis slicing her finger during a live broadcast.  The news outlets that covered this include:

NY Daily News

LA Times

USA Today

The Today Show

Entertainment Tonight

People

Huffington Post

TV Guide

Though my favorite headline is from eater.com: Giada DeLaurentiis Had a Bloody Accident on a Live Food Network Special

For fun, check out how they composed the link.

Ummmm, OK.  So, a chef cut herself while slicing something.  Thank GOD the media was alerted.  In other news, water is still wet.

Not that I don’t hope she’s OK.  I guess.  I mean, I’ll be glad when her natural healing process is complete, because I’m nice like that.  But unless Giada finally snapped and cut her finger open on purpose so the pain and blood could stoke the inner fires of her berserker rage,  and was charging an unsuspecting Rachael Ray, then this?  Is. Not. News.

The horror...the horror...

Mwah ha ha ha ha…The horror…the horror…
Image from esquire.com

Now, a Giada/Rachael knife fight at Food Network studios…THAT would have been interesting.  And–let’s face it–a long time coming.

Please, news networks.  Find something legitimately interesting, and stop Giada’s bloody rampage in its tracks.

Thank you.

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